Can this earth open up and swallow me whole?
Also reading a manga called 'vagabond'
—
Missing you
Tuesday, 28 February 2023
Salt tsunami aka tears
Ugh!!!
I cannot with these anaemic white lights!! I just can't.
Gimme golden glow. But somehow I feel in this house they will be wasted and lost.
However the new kitchen renovation had the planner put warm yellow lights under the cabinets which brighten up the kitchen and enable me find a bit of peace while chopping and cooking.
I won't mind being abducted by aliens just about right now!
Right now I say.
Beam me up whoever the fuck is out there.
I cannot with these anaemic white lights!! I just can't.
Gimme golden glow. But somehow I feel in this house they will be wasted and lost.
However the new kitchen renovation had the planner put warm yellow lights under the cabinets which brighten up the kitchen and enable me find a bit of peace while chopping and cooking.
I won't mind being abducted by aliens just about right now!
Right now I say.
Beam me up whoever the fuck is out there.
All the deets
Morning and I woke up with a headache. It feels like some headache switch was turned on last night and it kept blinking all through the night as I slept and every time I woke up for a drink of water the headache slapped me with its presence like a migraine entity.
Like a foolish optimist I kept thinking it will be gone once I wake up but of course I barely slept with a red light blaring at the back of my head and a hammering throb in my senses.
I woke up looking like a boiled egg left to get run over by a truck in the middle of the road.
Made tea and looked around for some banana to eat before a medicine but somehow I couldn't find any.
Made do with a few coconut biscuits.
Had a medicine. Now I'm sipping tea and I know within the hour my headache would be all gone.
I know the trigger for this and I shouldn't have been so callous despite knowing what I was doing wrong.
My aim is to not get a headache for the entire month of March!
Let's see if we can do it.
I am going to steadfastly avoid every trigger I know which sometimes despite knowing I still end up doing.
My day here begins.
it feels a bit like labour camp here.
I mean I'm perfectly happy doing all the chores at home but I do not like to do them here because the entire aura of everything amplifies my horrible mood and everything is triggering.
On a happier note my little ones seem to be doing well and look quite happy as they play all over. I keep checking on them via camera :)
Like a foolish optimist I kept thinking it will be gone once I wake up but of course I barely slept with a red light blaring at the back of my head and a hammering throb in my senses.
I woke up looking like a boiled egg left to get run over by a truck in the middle of the road.
Made tea and looked around for some banana to eat before a medicine but somehow I couldn't find any.
Made do with a few coconut biscuits.
Had a medicine. Now I'm sipping tea and I know within the hour my headache would be all gone.
I know the trigger for this and I shouldn't have been so callous despite knowing what I was doing wrong.
My aim is to not get a headache for the entire month of March!
Let's see if we can do it.
I am going to steadfastly avoid every trigger I know which sometimes despite knowing I still end up doing.
My day here begins.
it feels a bit like labour camp here.
I mean I'm perfectly happy doing all the chores at home but I do not like to do them here because the entire aura of everything amplifies my horrible mood and everything is triggering.
On a happier note my little ones seem to be doing well and look quite happy as they play all over. I keep checking on them via camera :)
Monday, 27 February 2023
Watching and liking
Episode 4 of 'the world of married' and I can see why so many mentioned about it being uncomfortable! It's probably cathartic for some who're thoroughly entwined in this business and especially a lot of spouses mostly women in this case who usually have an eye out for their husbands. And I'm not taking about the overly suspicious types. I'm talking about the regular cautious kinds which are almost most women. And there are some scenes which are a bit nail biting eye widening 'what's gonna happen now' to get you on edge.
It's a pretty yummy series! Or perhaps I'm just in that frame of mind where anything which is distracting is good enough.
It's a pretty yummy series! Or perhaps I'm just in that frame of mind where anything which is distracting is good enough.
Ugh
My head feels heavy, I feel sleepy all day and I don't know what to do here.
I feel like a person in another country who's lost their passport.
What am I doing here?
I feel like a useless bystander who occasionally helps with things.
There's only so much I can do. They're a line beyond which I feel I can't go. I can't offer nor commit the sort of intimate help that might be beneficial, not that anyone expects or evens wants that from me but still.
Ugh!
Haven't spoken to people more than a couple sentences and I usually just pace about in my room when I'm not cooking or cleaning or helping with other stuff.
Or I catch a few glimpses of the series .
Maybe I shouldndrink some coffee!
Feeling sleepy.
I feel like a person in another country who's lost their passport.
What am I doing here?
I feel like a useless bystander who occasionally helps with things.
There's only so much I can do. They're a line beyond which I feel I can't go. I can't offer nor commit the sort of intimate help that might be beneficial, not that anyone expects or evens wants that from me but still.
Ugh!
Haven't spoken to people more than a couple sentences and I usually just pace about in my room when I'm not cooking or cleaning or helping with other stuff.
Or I catch a few glimpses of the series .
Maybe I shouldndrink some coffee!
Feeling sleepy.
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