bad bad bad

Bad decision making, as undesirable as it may be, has a certain allure which stays atop thoughts like a magenta net of defensive dialogue keeping rationality at bay; oh, the seductiveness of second-guessing leading to a final cave in and doing something knowing full well you might regret it later, but at that moment regrets are the least of your concerns.

What do I rants on about you might well ask? What possibly could be a worse decision than getting married, a grave sin I'm already guilty of committing.. ah well, this one particularly bad decision is one often committed by a lot of us, usually in supermarkets.

Here are the premises. I had made a mental note to buy some puff pastry which is usually kept in the freezer section of supermarkets and as I was perusing the vast frigidarium like the haus of all things frosted I came upon some frozen fish. 

I usually don't bother with buying frozen fish in Shanghai, having access to fresh meats anytime I want, but again, it's the inevitable allure of having something immediately handy. I do often indulge in frozen foods., viz, frozen good quality prawns, chicken wings, dumplings, peas, squids, smoked salmon and the like and I've usually been happy with the outcomes. 

In fact, I'd often bought frozen salmon in the previous town I lived and loved many a good dishes thus, but this weekend past as I stood in front of a galactic proportioned freezer a beautiful package of frozen swordfish beckoned to me and though it was a bit pricey I assured myself a bit of indulgence.

The frozen fish sat serenely in my fridge until this morning when I liberated it from its cold confines and let it rest at room temperature to thaw, since the house is nearly as cold as the fridge and by afternoon when the ice had separated itself from the delicious fish flesh I tore out a chunk and tried to feed it to my cat as a reward for being so bloody adorable.

Now here's where this gets odd because the cat sniffed it and didn't bother to as much as even lick it.

Something off with his nose I presumed and ventured ahead and tried shoving that chunk right under his nasal passage and it was the cat that looked offended this time. Giving me his characteristic grumpy side eye he walked past ignoring me and the fish completely.

I'll tell you what I was and aghast was among one of the things because every time I've fed him fish he's purred himself into my life with the vehemence of a lost child on finding his mum and yet today..

Now, what do I make of this? I didn't eat the fish because if it's not good enough for the cat, it's certainly not good enough for me. I mean it's freshly packed and very good quality, but it failed the feline test and thusly shan't go anywhere near my mouth. 

There was a gnawing monologue at the back of my head while I was buying it, that maybe I shouldn't, that perhaps I was being too optimistic, but here's the thing about bad decisions, they are absolutely bewitching.