Not the most enlightened move to hurl yourself out in this weather, given that it's raining..especially given that it's raining.
Injudicious still more to not attire your feet in proper rainy weather footwear. Thinking to yourself 'oh I've only to walk a hundred paces.'. worse letting your legs stay wrapped in cottony bondage when a bit of felt or woolen would be have been by far the more sagacious decision while venturing on a bit of outdoorsy excursion.
Of course the same thinking came into play. 'I've only to walk a hundred odd paces'
Right, so a hundred odd paces in goddamn frigid chill, raining no less. Attired in grey cotton pants and canary yellow cloth shoes.
One step out of the house and I stood unyielding on my decision, though there was a far off voice almost a whisper at the back of my head telling me I was being a bit optimistic about my clothing's limited ability to weather the weather.
But what am I if not an impenetrable wall of firm decision making.
Down I go opening the all-knowing wise gates that are most thoughtfully kept shut, to keep out the sharp winds from entering our villaesque building.
My feelings on how I felt right after opening the gates could be surmised by understanding how a person would feel in the act of innocently opening doors of his house to let himself casually out but instead get greeted by a tumbling waterfall of icy sleet over his person, thus benumbing his veins into frosty lines of clotted blood.
My feelings were a bit like that, except I felt like I'd be found at the end of ice age, add to that tiny pinpricks of miniscule icebergs in the form of 'rains'.
What should be my next move was a question that darted through my spine jarring into my brains thus wreaking havoc on my nerve cells so that they stopped functioning for a moment and forgot to inform my feet that this is a good time to probably stop moving and RETREAT.
But no.. what am I if not resolute?
Umbrella to the rescue. Wearing a mask of nonchalant acclimatization to fool a few curious eyes that were probably trying to figure out my ill thought of attire, even if prim and fashionable.
You know that time when you're putting an act of bravado but instead trip and fall over a shoelace come undone.. well something like that, except it was my umbrella. The miserable piece of maroon contraption refused to open for a couple minutes as I walked letting myself get bedwed in ice boxed rain. It seemed to have got stuck, and I was almost about to shout a couple well rehearsed curses when it bloomed like a flower in my hands. Glory to you gods.
Now those hundred paces could have been a few thousand leagues and I'd have agreed because my legs felt like wooden boles that'd been freeze dried. So frigorific was the blasted 'breeze' that it sawed through my pants and throttled my thighs and calves with a polar vengeance.
As if my face turning white and nose blue weren't enough, I imprudently launched my foot into what felt like a pond but was in fact a rather tiny puddle of water.
But of course my canary yellow shoes wouldn't know the difference and soaked they got.
Murphy was apparently having a field day with his laws while I felt like a well dressed twig ready to blow with the stinging wind getting soaked at the same time.
Phew, hundred paces later I found myself at my destination where my intended work would not last more than five odd minutes.
Afraid that my umbrella would once again play the traitor on me, I left it to rest on its handle outside the shop while I bought what I'd come to buy (viz, eggs and banana. Just a couple things I'd forgotten after yesterdays 20 kg's worth grocery haul. Human minds I tell you.. playing such malicious games)
Triumphant I returned, trying to remember that I did in fact possess a pair of legs and promising how I'd warm them and swaddle them in winter woolens the moment I got back home.
But behold, I step out of the shop and see that my umbrella wasn't where I left it.
A frantic twist of the head in all directions showed me that a maroon thingummy was being dragged away from my sight, all on its own.
Ah the winds.. so cold so merciless so bloody annoying had in most pernicious mischief pulled and tugged at my only saviour (no matter how treacherous) and managed to tear it away to the other side of the road. Gasps!
To jaywalk like an uncivilized citizen was for me the work of moments. Retrieving my ever abandoning flying umbrella and finally unleashing my much held back curses I slowly began to cradle it. For what am I if not in love with all things reunion.
Slowly we walked back home. The umbrella, bananas and eggs and me.
The only thing I felt was my torso. Legs and feet had stopped co-operating with me in lieu of them getting frozen and wet.
Reaching my house and feeling a sudden gust of warmth wrapping my body and ensconcing stupefied limbs within its comfortable heated humidity was among the more gratifying events of this season.
I have now wrapped my legs and feet in worthy woolens, ones that demand acknowledgement this weather.
My lovely yellow shoes are now in the washer and will be stowed away for this season.
I was in denial, but I've faced the truth now.
Winters are here and it only gets worse here on.
Sigh..
Injudicious still more to not attire your feet in proper rainy weather footwear. Thinking to yourself 'oh I've only to walk a hundred paces.'. worse letting your legs stay wrapped in cottony bondage when a bit of felt or woolen would be have been by far the more sagacious decision while venturing on a bit of outdoorsy excursion.
Of course the same thinking came into play. 'I've only to walk a hundred odd paces'
Right, so a hundred odd paces in goddamn frigid chill, raining no less. Attired in grey cotton pants and canary yellow cloth shoes.
One step out of the house and I stood unyielding on my decision, though there was a far off voice almost a whisper at the back of my head telling me I was being a bit optimistic about my clothing's limited ability to weather the weather.
But what am I if not an impenetrable wall of firm decision making.
Down I go opening the all-knowing wise gates that are most thoughtfully kept shut, to keep out the sharp winds from entering our villaesque building.
My feelings on how I felt right after opening the gates could be surmised by understanding how a person would feel in the act of innocently opening doors of his house to let himself casually out but instead get greeted by a tumbling waterfall of icy sleet over his person, thus benumbing his veins into frosty lines of clotted blood.
My feelings were a bit like that, except I felt like I'd be found at the end of ice age, add to that tiny pinpricks of miniscule icebergs in the form of 'rains'.
What should be my next move was a question that darted through my spine jarring into my brains thus wreaking havoc on my nerve cells so that they stopped functioning for a moment and forgot to inform my feet that this is a good time to probably stop moving and RETREAT.
But no.. what am I if not resolute?
Umbrella to the rescue. Wearing a mask of nonchalant acclimatization to fool a few curious eyes that were probably trying to figure out my ill thought of attire, even if prim and fashionable.
You know that time when you're putting an act of bravado but instead trip and fall over a shoelace come undone.. well something like that, except it was my umbrella. The miserable piece of maroon contraption refused to open for a couple minutes as I walked letting myself get bedwed in ice boxed rain. It seemed to have got stuck, and I was almost about to shout a couple well rehearsed curses when it bloomed like a flower in my hands. Glory to you gods.
Now those hundred paces could have been a few thousand leagues and I'd have agreed because my legs felt like wooden boles that'd been freeze dried. So frigorific was the blasted 'breeze' that it sawed through my pants and throttled my thighs and calves with a polar vengeance.
As if my face turning white and nose blue weren't enough, I imprudently launched my foot into what felt like a pond but was in fact a rather tiny puddle of water.
But of course my canary yellow shoes wouldn't know the difference and soaked they got.
Murphy was apparently having a field day with his laws while I felt like a well dressed twig ready to blow with the stinging wind getting soaked at the same time.
Phew, hundred paces later I found myself at my destination where my intended work would not last more than five odd minutes.
Afraid that my umbrella would once again play the traitor on me, I left it to rest on its handle outside the shop while I bought what I'd come to buy (viz, eggs and banana. Just a couple things I'd forgotten after yesterdays 20 kg's worth grocery haul. Human minds I tell you.. playing such malicious games)
Triumphant I returned, trying to remember that I did in fact possess a pair of legs and promising how I'd warm them and swaddle them in winter woolens the moment I got back home.
But behold, I step out of the shop and see that my umbrella wasn't where I left it.
A frantic twist of the head in all directions showed me that a maroon thingummy was being dragged away from my sight, all on its own.
Ah the winds.. so cold so merciless so bloody annoying had in most pernicious mischief pulled and tugged at my only saviour (no matter how treacherous) and managed to tear it away to the other side of the road. Gasps!
To jaywalk like an uncivilized citizen was for me the work of moments. Retrieving my ever abandoning flying umbrella and finally unleashing my much held back curses I slowly began to cradle it. For what am I if not in love with all things reunion.
Slowly we walked back home. The umbrella, bananas and eggs and me.
The only thing I felt was my torso. Legs and feet had stopped co-operating with me in lieu of them getting frozen and wet.
Reaching my house and feeling a sudden gust of warmth wrapping my body and ensconcing stupefied limbs within its comfortable heated humidity was among the more gratifying events of this season.
I have now wrapped my legs and feet in worthy woolens, ones that demand acknowledgement this weather.
My lovely yellow shoes are now in the washer and will be stowed away for this season.
I was in denial, but I've faced the truth now.
Winters are here and it only gets worse here on.
Sigh..
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