The updates and downs of it

The local 'French' restaurant I used to haunt mainly for baguettes and coffee back in Shanghai called 'rive de pains' which was located about 50 feet from my house has been sending me messages enquiring about my absence and telling me about their new 'sesame baguettes' and I have not the heart to tell them I live there no longer that I am not even on the same continent :(
In a strange twist of events I have literally come to the shore of loaves which is what the name of their restaurant literally translates to and I do miss the ease of walking to that restaurant/bakery to pick up a flask of coffee, something which is amiss here at least in my village that is.
I'm Beginning to think that someone who's used to a steady supply of takeouts wouldn't do very well living here since there's not a single food delivery app that delivers here.
Hah!! Oh well.

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The strange anxiety of always looking outside expecting someone to bang on my door or lean on the doorbell has greatly reduced and for the past few weeks I'm able to shower without a second thought, when earlier I would step out soaking wet several times to peek out of the window expecting someone standing outside in a hazmat suit.
I'm still unable to load my shopping cart in a grocery store to capacity because it brings back strange memories of difficult times just weeks before lockdown when the ominous signs were floating and people were panicking in superstores, stacking their carts to the skies and the stores had run dry of milk, vegetables, fruits and people were shoving each other aside and screaming and pulling things and the payment line would be over two hours long and I would be standing in shock with my friend with our carts empty of anything significant but full of whatever crap we could lay our hands on. Tetra pack milk, low grade cup noodles, bags of sugar and salt, oil bottles, frozen meat, of brand chips, garlic, ginger, water bottles.

I didn't realise how those moments impacted me until I went to a grocery store a couple weeks ago and 'people' started piling stuff into the cart and I couldn't get myself to look at it and broke down. I had to abruptly leave the place and I thought I couldn't breathe.
I think I'll slowly get over that too but in the meanwhile since that episode we have been doing small shoppings every couple days to avoid that moment from recurring.

So strange right?